|
Bernie
Bernie started riding at the ripe old age of 51 somewhat late in life by anybody’s reckoning!. Since then the “hobby” has become a way of life.
The once a week visit to the local riding stables for the occasional hack out into the forest with a few others has now become, “ Oh yes we have our own horse and stables don’t you know!! And we have a different set of Johdpurs for every day of the week, morning and afternoon, as we couldn’t possibly ride, {after lunch in the pub}, in the same set of jodhpurs we were wearing in the morning!!! Could we!!
And you think I’m joking ………………..read on.
We use to have two very nice Jaguars, which have now both been dispensed with as the ambient aurora of leather and walnut had been replaced by the stench of wet johdpurs!! And horse poo!! A very large four by four is on the horizon!, but I will have a say in what color it is!!
The wardrobe has taken a change {in my opinion for the worse, although my opinion counts for little compared to that of “Oscar”, our beloved white charger!!}. Gone are some of the most beautiful designer labels that Bernie use to adorn on regular evening’s out {she always looked so glamorous, notice I use the past tense!!}, only to be replaced by thigh length riding boots, spurs and the most beautiful selection of hand made leather whips!
The whips and boots I can live with, it’s the spurs that cause a problem!
Our social calendar still remains fairly full although whereas we use to be seen in some of the more fashionable local restaurants and bars, we now spend our evenings out sat in draughty old country pubs whose front door appears to have deliberately been built to take the top of your scalp off as you attempt to enter the premises, much to the amusement of all the locals who, at a quick glance strangely all appear to be five foot two and balding whatever their age! However nursing a swollen and throbbing hairline we can at least enjoy our meal in the tranquil rural surroundings enjoying the breathtaking scenery, and watching the horses in the adjoining field…….
Shagging each other senseless!
Apart from these minor changes brought to our lives by our dear Oscar, life in the horsey, rather than fast lane, can be rather fun. We have developed a whole new circle of friends from all walks of life who all share a passion for horses, and absolutely nothing else! If it hasn’t got horse written on it, the ladies don’t want to know. And us mere blokes are left to pick up the poo clean the cars, {every day}! And make the bed every morning as the other half, who use to stay in bed till ten now leaps out of bed straight into clean johdpurs and hurtles out the door with screams of off to do the horse’s breakfast see you later!!
Household chores have never looked so inviting……………
|
